Drop by TRU and have a spot of tear — for Sue

Tuesday, April 1, 2008









I NEVER GOT TO KNOW SUE Lachowicz as well as I would have liked. We’d see each other a couple of times a year, always at the fund-raisers our mutual friend, Kathy Roberts, holds to raise money to help local people dealing with breast cancer — of which she was one.
The last time I saw Sue was at Kathy’s fall version, where she strode around the room, giving out bear hugs to friends, showing off the outfit she was wearing — one that stood out even in an event that is centred around fashion — and finally taking the stage to tell the 300 gathered that what they had heard was true.
Her cancer had not only returned, but her doctors had told her she likely didn’t have much time left.
But before she left the stage, she promised to do everything she could to be at the next fundraiser, which takes place Sunday at the Grand Hall at Thompson Rivers University.
But this time, Sue won’t be there.
All we’ll have is the memory of a truly amazing, strong, determined woman who weathered so much in her short life and, if she ever complained about it, few knew.
Last September, just two days after her 51st birthday, Sue was the guest speaker at the annual Pink Ribbon Ball.
She spoke of being diagnosed with breast cancer, the same disease that took both her birth mother and her twin sister.
She talked about how ugly the disease is, as are its treatments of chemotherapy and radiation.
She spoke of how, on that very day, just like every day before and since, six women in British Columbia had been diagnosed with the disease.
But this amazing woman also talked of the gifts she had received because of the disease.
Sue had decided the disease would never control her.
She couldn’t control it, but she wasn’t going to give in to it, either.
“I had the power,” she told a completely captivated audience.
“I could make a choice about my attitude. And so I made the decision to live.
“I made the decision to try to continue to live my life in as normal fashion as I could.”
And so a cruise she and her husband had planned went ahead, even though by the time departure came around, the disease had taken its toll on her physically.
It just didn’t beat Sue’s spirit.
She wore the most special dress she had ever bought, an extravagance she could have said no to, if she’d let the disease do the talking.
But Sue didn’t do that.
She started a blog, writing about her life, her goals, her ups, her downs — and through it, Sue made friends from around the world.
On Sunday, many of Sue’s friends will attend the fashion show and fundraiser.
They’ll laugh at the skits — this year’s theme takes a broad swipe at the reality of menopause — and they’ll marvel at the fashions.
They’ll spend a lot of money on tickets for the many door prizes.
They’ll sip white wine — and more than a few will make a silent toast to their silenced friend.
And they’ll notice, when Kathy calls all the cancer survivors in attendance to come up to the stage, that their friend isn’t there.
There might still be some tickets left for anyone who’s interested.
They’re only $20 — and for that, you’ll get a lot.
But more importantly, you’ll be giving so much more.
You’ll be standing up for those who can’t anymore — for the 500 women each year in B.C. who die from breast cancer.
Including the incredible, unforgettable Sue.
dale@kamlooopsthisweek.com
dalebass.blogspot.