Street Level

Further in this edition of KTW, you’ll find a story about a search for Kamloops residents who would qualify for the TV reality show Canada’s Worst Driver.

I have oh-so-many people I’d like to register for this show. Too bad providing licence plates isn’t sufficient.

The producers need names, which means I’d have to know these people — and if I did, well, I’d take the time to explain to them some key elements of the vehicles they drive.

For example, I’d have them sit in the driver’s seat and then show them that cute little lever, to the left and just behind the steering wheel, that goes up and down.

Up means the car’s about to turn right. Down means the opposite.

It would be necessary to explain that this lever doesn’t operate on its own. Much like the drivers can’t really read their children’s minds to divine what it is they want done, these pieces of electronics and plastic need some direction (pardon the pun) in order to let the rest of us know the direction.

While we’re at it, this would be a good time to explain to the person in the driver’s seat that the steering wheel is for guiding the vehicle down the road, not to rest your arms on as you try to roll up that rim while driving.

Or apply your mascara.

I’d love to suggest the driver of the dirty brown truck I followed for almost nine minutes a few weeks ago as he forced cars off the road (mine included) as we came off the Halston Bridge toward the Husky Gas Station on the Yellowhead Highway.

This was all in a desperate effort to catch up with some tiny import of a car, which the truck driver did, only to start gesturing wildly and in a threatening manner at the driver of the tiny car, trying to force it off the road.

Sensing road rage, and being a reporter (albeit off-duty returning from piano lessons), I followed this idiot as he swerved at the smaller car, continuing to yell and shake his fist.

And yes, the police were called.

Then there are the people in this town who should have handed in the licence years ago, sometime after they hit their 90th birthday.

Now, don’t get me wrong.

This is not an anti-aging thing, but the reality is that when some of them are out on the street, surrounded by those never-signalling-always-eating-completely distracted other drivers, it’s a scenario that could lead to disaster.

Like the dude in the red sports car who jumps from lane to lane as he soars through Valleyview, once even dropping down into a right-hand turn lane then whipping across the cross-street and re-entering the highway through the access road — just to avoid a red light.

All of these people would be strong contenders for the title awarded by the people behind the worst-driver show.

No sense in even touching the truly crappy driving we all see every day from that one new breed of driver.

You know, the car that almost crosses the white line, then weaves over just a bit to the other side, then starts to slow down so the driver can finally concentrate on the cellphone call being taken.

I just know how much attention that driver is giving to the road.

And there are no polite words to use for those drivers who feel it’s OK to drive along the Trans-Canada Highway and keep those high beams glaring against oncoming traffic.

Consider this the tidied up words I’d like to say to them. “I can’t see the road, you moron! Sure glad you can see it so brightly!”

When I learned to drive, my instructor — a retired bus driver — made it clear to me that the hunk of metal (yes, this was oh-so-many years ago) was not a toy, but something that could hurt people if it wasn’t handled properly.

And he made it clear to me that no matter how good a driver I thought I was, I wasn’t — which meant there would be a lot of over-confident, but truly bad, drivers on the roads with me.

Growing up at racetracks, I also learned early just how much damage a car can cause, even if it just bumps another one. It just takes watching your uncle, one of the top drivers back in the 1960s for the Joie Chitwood Hell Drivers, do a flying T-bone into another car to impress that fact on you.

My cousin, a stock-car driver, hit the wall in a race once and walked away alive.

Yes, I learned at a very young age that driving a car isn’t to be taken lightly and that every time you get into one, you’re level of responsibility to everyone else in your community rises.

But if there’s just one thing you do to change your driving habits today, take a second when you get into the car to introduce yourself to that lane-change lever.

It would be a big step to avoiding becoming one of Canada’s worst drivers.

dale@kamloopsthisweek.com

Posted by Dale at 8:40 a.m. Comments