Street Level

By DALE BASS
Some people may find it ironic that, once the family of Bob Calderoni prevailed in court and treatment began again on his failing kidneys, he died.
Even his daughter, Catherine Donnelly, acknowledged the treatments her father received on the last day of his life likely killed him.
But for the Calderoni family, that’s not the point. They wanted Bob’s future decided by them and by the God they believe in fervently, not by a medical system they saw as cold and dismissive.
So, when Bob finally died, it was because his family told the doctors to stop the CPR they had been doing for so long. This was God’s will. They could accept it.
Because if anything can be said about the Calderoni family, it is this: They believe in the sanctity of life. They believe in the will to live. They believe in the power of prayer.
They believe in things so far outside the clinical, scientific foundation that forms our medical system that the two might as well have been speaking different languages in recent days as Bob’s medical care became an issue for each.
Since KTW first wrote about the dispute surrounding Bob, an otherwise healthy, athletic father of three who was rarely sick, we’ve been receiving a lot of feedback. Some of it has been in favour of the hospital, some in favour of the family.
But that’s what you get when you’ve got science on one side and God on the other. There really is little reconciliation to be had.
There were some facts on which all could agree.
Bob was a strong, healthy 67-year-old being treated for a urinary tract infection when, on Sept. 28, he suffered a massive bleed at the back of his brain near that crucial stem area. His wife, Alma, found him on the floor, unconscious, a condition from which he never recovered during his five months in Royal Inland Hospital.
The family knew the doctors were right when they said it was a traumatic injury, one from which few people recover.
But few isn’t everyone. There’s that wriggle room for hope.
Room for prayer.
As time went on, doctors even talked about bringing Bob out of the coma using a drug that has shown some success. They started the treatments and the family believed they were seeing signs that Bob wasn’t really in a vegetative state, but rather locked in and struggling to break free.
It was another chance for hope.
Another time for prayer.
Then the infections started and the drug had to be stopped. Bob went from one infection to another, so many that Alma — who admittedly has an obsession about germs — started to confront the nurses about the cross-contamination she feared was happening.
Again, it’s not unusual to pick up an infection when you’re in the hospital. Stay long enough and you might get plenty of them. Her fears weren’t necessarily unfounded.
However, by then, the nurses knew that Alma is devoutly pro-life, as is her family. She would sit in Bob’s room and sing hymns. She would play religious music for him.
She would pray.
Her entire belief system is based on something completely foreign to those whose lives revolve around predictability and science.
Because Alma just believes.
The next thing she knew, she was being restricted from her husband of 47 years. What had been around-the-clock access to be with him became the posted visiting hours. She couldn’t argue with the nurses and doctors anymore.
In fact, some doctors on Bob’s case refused to speak with any family members.
Imagine yourself in that position. Someone you love deeply is in the hospital, unable to speak for himself, and the people charged with his care won’t talk to you.
And then, this hospital’s administration overrules the family’s wishes and imposes a do-not-resuscitate (DNR) order on that person you love.
It was all too much for the family to take.
So, when they argued in court to have the DNR removed, and the judge did so for 14 days to give them some time to find new doctors, the Calderoni family once again had control over Bob’s life.
And that’s all they wanted — control to make the decisions themselves, knowing that God would listen and guide them.
I don’t understand that kind of blind faith. Science makes sense to me.
But a part of me wonders if, had that been my husband lying in that hospital bed, whether I would have done anything different.
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© Copyright 2007 Kamloops This Week

Posted by Dale at 11:01 a.m. Comments